This is an evening I'll remember all of my life. Thank you to the wonderful fellow TEF mom Sally who drove from New Hampshire to attend with me, and gave me incredible moral support today (as well as feeding me twice and setting me up to use the hospital's Seacrest Studio to record my contribution to the Mormon Tabernacle Worldwide Messiah!). After arriving an hour early to sign up and get a seat, we listened to four hours of 3-minute testimonies both for and against the destruction of the Prouty Garden given to a standing-room-only audience, from passionate and intelligent people all wanting to move forward with what's best for children. I don't envy the decision committee, but it was pretty clear to me from the arguments given that other land choices weren't adequately considered. Some famous people spoke tonight, lots of doctors, important scientists, CEOs, Dr Barry Brazelton, it was incredible. Too many amazing comments to list. I was the only inpatient parent, which made it fun to get up when I had to announce my address--the 10th floor of Boston Children's. Here's what I shared along with a couple photos of Audrey; the words are far from perfect, but perfectly from the heart:
This is Audrey. She's 4 years old, and for the past 3 years we've been traveling from Utah to Boston for specialized surgery. She has spent, all combined, nearly a year of her life in the hospital, including these past four weeks. In the past month I've left the hospital building twice; this makes three times. We do share a room with another patient, and we're thankful for that because we are here pretty much alone, away from her Daddy and four siblings. She's not feeling well today, but I'm here with her blessing, because in her words "If they break the garden, I'll be heartbroken."
There are some who say it's worth sacrificing the Prouty garden for the new building, because we should focus on getting more children well and sending them back home to their own gardens. That is spoken from the viewpoint of someone who has never stood where we stand. I'm speaking today on behalf of thousands of patients who are spread across the globe who come here for specialized surgery and treatment. If you could see them right now, this room could not contain us. While we certainly want every child to get well, and we love Boston Children's and support growth, what that argument fails to consider is that some of us are inpatient receiving specialized critical care for months at a time, some patients are even here for the rest of their lives. This IS our own garden. When you are inpatient, you cannot leave. The hospital is our entire world. And in that world, we need this green escape, where the air is open to the wild sky and the trees are old and lovely, where we feel the wide openness of natural green space and those tall yet distant hospital walls protect us from the jarring sounds of traffic. I respectfully submit that no smaller green space or rooftop container garden can duplicate this unique jewel.
Audrey and I have been inpatient nearly a month now recovering from the fourth major surgery on her complicated body. One afternoon the week after surgery, she started having unexplained episodes where she would suddenly stop breathing. After hours of intense caregiving, I suddenly started feeling trapped by encroaching walls everywhere I looked. I started perspiring and needed to escape outdoors--I can only imagine how she was feeling! Going out the front of the hospital would not only have dumped me into a cacophony of noise and traffic, but I would have felt like I was abandoning my daughter. I needed that open feeling that no smaller green space could have given. I ran to the Prouty Garden, the place where I feel safe. I agree with Dr Brazelton's assessment that it should be considered sacred space, because when I'm there the world is shut out and I feel close to God.
